MOVIE CHEAT SHEET: Tired of hearing about Avatar 2?
Like a lot of people, movie maven Brian Gasparek is sick to death of hearing about Avatar 2.
BRIAN GASPAREK/ 24 HOURS
THE BIG STORY:
Enough with Avatar, James
Is anyone else getting tired of James Cameron and his Avatar sequel banter? All he ever talks about is how he's going to deliver four (ugh, four) mind-blowing 3D sequels to his 2009 blockbuster and how they're all going to change the theatre-going experience forever. But for some reason, the only action we ever see him taking is pushing back their release dates, and most recently, making them all sound uber unappealing. This week, Cameron took his annoying Avatar banter a step further when he revealed a completely nonsensical narrative teaser for his sequels. According to James, Stephen Lang's very dead Colonel Quaritch, and his equally deceased sidekick, Matt Gerald's Corporal Wainfleet, are both going to reprise their roles as the franchise's main villains for not one, but all four of the sequels. Huh? Not only does that make zero sense, it sounds painfully unimaginative ... even for one sequel. Come on James, you've got to dig a little deeper than that for your four alleged epics. The original Avatar was a good film. But it's been nearly a decade since its release, and we're still at least two years away from a first sequel. Any excitement I've had for seeing a second chapter (or a third, fourth or fifth) has long expired with the passing time, not to mention Cameron's inactivity and his off-the-mark hype. I'd be fine if we never heard about an Avatar sequel again.
Brolin vs. Cameron
I'm not the only one who doesn't care about James Cameron's forever gestating Avatar BS anymore. Josh Brolin is also on my side. In an awesomely candid interview this week, Brolin admitted that Cameron was pushing him to star in Avatar 2, but he had absolutely no interest in it. Apparently, Brolin's pass caused a beef between him and Cameron, but Josh couldn't care less. According to Brolin, "If I don't want to do Avatar, I'm not going to do Avatar. James Cameron's f--ing calling me this name and that name. Whatever. If James Cameron came to me and said, 'Hey, man, why'd you say that?'I'd go, 'Because it happened.'" Way to not put up with Cameron's crap, JB. Respect.
Milla the Blood Queen
Alright, I'll admit it. Although I was originally bitter about Guillermo del Toro and Ron Perlman getting bounced from the Hellboy franchise in favour of an R-rated, David Harbour led reboot, I'm starting to get excited about the fresh start. This week it was announced that Milla Jovovich has been cast as the film's villain. It looks like Jovovich will be playing Hellboy's evil witch nemesis The Blood Queen (better known as Nimue in the comics). Very badass. After battling monsters for six Resident Evil flicks, it will be awesome to see Milla become one. Sorry, Guillermo, this movie may be solid after all.
More Hunger Games and Twilight?
Just when we thought we all safely repressed the worst of this decade's young adult fiction film sagas, it looks like the two most successful (and most lowbrow) franchises may be making a comeback. Rumours are swirling that Lionsgate is pushing for additional instalments of both The Hunger Games and Twilight, despite their source material being mercifully tapped. Word has it that the studio's CEO, Jon Feltheimer, is hoping to create new stories taking place in each of the two respective universes. Oh Hollywood, if this materializes, it's a low point. How are fresh ideas this scarce? No more sparkly vampires or teen death matches, please!
BEST AND WORST IN THEATRES:
Freaky Fun: Annabelle: Creation
Who would have thought that a fourth film in The Conjuring franchise, focused on the origin of Annabelle the doll, could still elicit some solid freaky fun? Critics are praising Annabelle: Creation for being a back-to-basics horror flick with jump scares and creeps aplenty. It's not being acclaimed as a smart, genre-changing film; it's just good ol' horror fun. If you want to be spooked this weekend, pay Annabelle a visit.
Beige Castle: The Glass Castle
Fans of Jeannette Walls' 2005 memoir, The Glass Castle, will want to take a hard pass on Destin Daniel Cretton's adaptation this weekend. Critics are saying that despite some poignant moments, the film spreads itself too thin trying to document the details of Walls'traumatic youth. Its heavy moments are presented softer than intended. Despite some great acting by Brie Larson and Woody Harrelson, the film feels long and beige overall. Enter at your own risk.
No Comment: The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature
If you can't remember the original Nut Job, there's a good reason for it. It was crap. Critics roasted those nuts. Despite its outcome, Surly Squirrel has been granted another adventure, and its reviews have been held back all week. It's guaranteed to be road kill. Skip it.